I’m A Wretched Writer

wretched writer

Being a writer is harder than it sounds. Since December I’ve had a hard time getting into my writing.  I blamed the holidays at first. You know all the hoopla that goes on with that.  Then I was having some health issues and had some pain and I blamed that.  I’ve worked with a friend at trying to combat this and it didn’t help. I’ve ran out of things to blame.

I’ve heard different views on writer’s block. I tend to believe that when you get discouraged you back away from writing, and other things in life.  I’ve been working on my current book for a while now.  I’m a little ashamed that I don’t have it completed yet.  I’ve allowed myself to get in the way.  I’m a wretched writer. It’s at times like this that you face a turning point.

When you hit a rough patch in something that you’re working hard at or that you have a passion for, you begin to question things. Am I supposed to be doing this? Am I wasting my time? Am I just like one of those people on talent shows that thinks they can sing and my loved ones have told me I could? When in reality I can’t carry a tune or in this case write a decent paragraph? So the snowball starts to build and if it runs you over, then you’re out.  You’re in jeopardy of putting your dream aside and giving up.

That’s the turning point I’m talking about.  When you get to that point you have to buckle down and remind yourself why you’re doing what you’re doing. If you don’t love it, then it’s time to put it aside and go after something you do love. Don’t waste your time anymore.  For me, I know I can’t do without writing.  Whether I’m a deluded hack or not makes no difference.  I have to do it.  I trust that if God put this desire in me then he will use it for something.  So I choose to pick myself up by the bootstraps and start writing my butt off.

So, that’s what I’m going to do.  That’s one reason I started giving away my book chapters to everyone who is an email subscriber. I have no choice but to write.  Eventually I’ll run out of chapters that I have already completed and if I don’t have more ready to go, then I’ll be letting you guys down. I don’t want to do that! It’s a form of accountability.

The last thing I want to mention here is one of the big reasons I think I’ve been blocked in my writing is I really don’t have the funds for a proper editor or book cover artist.  Knowing this I hesitate to finish because I know when I’m done I’ll be in limbo. I can do my rewrites and fill in the story where I need to, but to get that proper edit I need to hire someone. I have a person in mind and I’ve calculated the cost, as well as the costs of book cover art.  It’s a steep price, one that I wouldn’t have even if I had a full time job. So you can see how that’s discouraging.

I do have two ways you can help if you feel like you would like to.  I’ve set up a GoFundMe for these expenses. Or you can also click the DONATE button to the side and leave a donation through PayPal.  I can’t tell you how much I appreciate each gift no matter how small or large. They all will go into making this the best book it can be.  If I can do anything to help you out as well, don’t hesitate to go the contact me page and send me an email.  I’ll work with you in any way I can.

Go out there and do what you love. Don’t get discouraged, if it’s inside of you, you have to do it. I’m praying for you. Together we can do it!

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5 Replies to “I’m A Wretched Writer”

  1. Thanks Jase for sharing so vulnerably. Keep going! I sense God in much of what you are doing – from the first time I came to your website. LIke you, I’m struggling, but I haven’t got to the point of even sharing my vulnerability on a blog – the tech side of it is challenging me. Like you, I’m still sticking to this dream & I’ll leave the details that are eluding me to God to fill in at the right time.

    1. Thank you for the encouraging words Colleen. I appreciate you stopping by. The tech side of this can be overwhelming that’s for sure. I struggle with that at times too. I’ll be praying for you. God bless.

  2. Jase, grace brother. Give yourself grace. You are a good writer with a story to be heard. My son is an illustrator if you would like to consider a different option. He is a very talented artist, let me know if you want to setup a connect. You can FB IM me.

    I believe in you!
    Chris

    1. Hey Chris! Thank you. You know how it is. The enemy would love to make us give up. It serves a twofold purpose. 1. We will be miserable. 2. If we give up, God can’t use us in our gifted area. I refuse to lose.

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